Putters – the interactive, themed, light-flashing, craziest Manchester mini-golf experience – may appear to be a game of chance. But the competitive types among us don’t believe in fortune. Nor do we just play for fun… we always play to win.

It doesn’t matter to the would-be winners out there who they’re playing. Be it an 8-year-old niece, ‘too big for their boots’ teenage kids, or elderly aunts, the pro-style Putters participant will not accept second place. A glorious final hole shootout snatched by a flukey opponent at the death or a defeat that’s really a moral victory may be tolerable to some – but not to us winners.

Losers say that it’s the taking part that counts. Winners say that it’s only taking apart your opponents that counts. Here are some tips on how to turn your fun Manchester night out into one that concludes with a journey home carrying the trophy.

Every shot is a shot at goal

Unlike a par-5 at The Belfy, Putters is a game of deft touches rather than thumping the ball in a demonstration of brute strength. So, soft controlled precision putts aligned with careful tactics on every hole are required. You can still shout ‘fore’ if you wish – just remember that a ball bouncing off the ceiling has as much chance of thwacking you on the bonce as anyone else.

Stand up and be counted

In golf, the stance is the dance. Tour golfers know this. It’s the equivalent of a boxer staring down their opponent (just that golfers stare down at the ball rather than eyeballing the competition). That’s why Tiger and Rory bend their knees and stick their bum out a bit. Select a club that reaches belt height from the floor for maximum comfort. Spread your feet to about a foot apart for supreme stability. Then remember to wiggle the club before you take the swing. This adds an element of showmanship to the display – just don’t make contact at this point or you’ll look like a fool.

It’s all in the mind

You have two opponents in a game of Putters – the other person who’s not bad at it/lucky and yourself. Even in a large-ish group of mini golfers, there are rarely more than two competitors who are any good. Everyone else will be making up the numbers (make sure they realise this). So, positive self-talk and psyching out the soon-to-be runner up are essential.

Visualise the ball gracefully entering the cup at the first time of asking at every hole. Some players like to noisily exhale two or three heavy breaths before every shot. That way everyone else knows you mean business. If you believe you’re the finest putter player in the building, it will come true* (*most of the time).

Remember to wallow in the victory celebrations and, if you’ve been wise in the pre-match build-up, you’ll have settled on a prize for your inevitable win. We’d recommend a burger from THE BUTCHER as a most suitable reward. Oh, and remember to have fun – but recall the wise words of Roger Federer (aka the ‘Tennis GOAT’) – “Clearly when you win everything, it’s more fun”.

Get on down to Urban Playground to experience one of the latest things to do in Manchester. Not to toot our own horn, but we think we’re among the best Manchester attractions ready to rival the biggest.